Feast Of Love
Gone Baby Gone
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Feast Of Love |
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Gone Baby Gone |
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Elephant
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This is quite obviously supposed
to be a tender and poignant take on a pretty sensitive subject: school
massacres; in the school, by the school, for the school. It is an
unimaginably scary thought to receive a phone call that says "Mr Bloggs,
your child has been killed by another student with a gun during school
today." Just as scary would be being the students themselves, facing
one of their peers while they fire a semi-automatic at them. A hard
one to rationalise from both sides. Elephant takes the latter
approach... ...and does shit-for-justice to the topic. This flick has the impact of goose down on ice, and for shits and giggles, they make it arty as well. Look, I understand there are ways of telling stories and there are ways of telling stories, but if you're going to invent one, please check reality for a gauge on what works and what doesn't. And if you've done that, use the stuff that does! There's not much to spoil so I'll just plough on. This film follows around a few key characters for a day-in-the-life at school. Our director does that thing where they introduce the character with an initial scene, then writes their name across the screen. Tons of movies have done it (I think "Go" was a spesh) and its just a cool way of introducing key characters. I've used the word 'key' next the to the word 'characters' twice in this paragraph now, and for good reason, because guess what? This is how they introduce key characters in films that HAVE key characters. This film uses it to introduce just about every character, and none of them have anything to do with anything! IDIOTS! The other thing this film does is follow its characters around while they walk. And walk. And walk. Yup, most of them just walk around all day. None of them seem to go to class, they just walk around. So while we're watching the backs of these people walk, and talk occasionally - you know, interact and stuff - they encounter the other students that we've been following around previously. And if we meet a character that we haven't followed on their daily walk, well you can bet your pension we're about to soon! And then its over with the implied hail of bullets. We're all supposed to sit back and go "wow, how the hell are we supposed to comprehend how these things can happen", when in actual fact we're finding it hard to believe that someone took this project seriously enough to green light it. Here's where Benno reads into the presumed hidden messages and gives the film too much credit. See, its obvious that the premise is we're all too concerned with things that don't matter much in the big scheme, because when it all ends, what were we worried about really? The shape of our body? Which people to hang around to make us look cool? Pretty meaningless shit. Perhaps this film is also taking a poke at the modern US high-schooler. What I hope this film doesn't do is try and tell us that kids who Columbine their school mates are gay, because gay is sick and twisted it makes kids crazy. You'll know what I mean if you've seen it. I'd like to hear two words from the makers of this film: "Hi, yeah look we decided to make a film that shows the horrors of school yard massacres, with the idea of shocking people into never doing it again, but we're really sorry we fucked it up...here's your money back." 1 star...nah too generous, make that a half! |
Entourage
|
I'd heard bits and pieces about
this show for some time, and when I saw it was winning Emmy awards in its
then fourth season, I thought I'd have to give it a go. Apart from the
cast being almost total unknowns for me, I love Jeremy Pivon's work on just
about everything he does. So I went and grabbed season one for a
looksee. Well it was probably only three or four weeks later that we'd made our way through all four seasons in existence and hanging out for more, talk about addictive. Its one of those shows you can watch just to wash the day away, its totally light hearted, its as immersive as you want it to be yet there's nothing heavy about the entertainment on offer. But if you find yourselves really digging each character, which we found very easy to do, particularly Pivon's "Ari Gold", then there's plenty on offer here. Entourage follows the lives of four friends: Vincent Chase, Hollywood's newest young star finally breaking it big in movies; Eric Murphy, Vincent's best friend since childhood and business manager; Johnny "Drama" Chase, Vincent's cousin, cook, and aspiring actor himself; and Turtle, friend and driver. They travel the day-to-day "grind" of being a movie star, and looking after the movie star, renting McMansions in the Hollywood Hills, hobnobbing with Hollywood heavyweights, all with the goal of finding Vince the next big movie and the millions that come along with it. For anyone even mildly curious about what goes on in the lives of actors as they ply their trade off-screen, this is the show for you. Some of the shit they get up to, the parties, the romances, the hell they put Vince's uber agent Ari Gold through. Also appearing regularly on the show are real life personalities, playing themselves, including Jessica Alba (they stay in her house for a few weeks), Scarlett Johanson, James Woods (they steal his awards night tickets), Gary Busey (he's a pisser!), Hugh Hefner (they go to a Playboy Mansion pary) and James Cameron (who directs the fictional blockbuster Aquaman staring Vince and Mandy Moore). The show is loosely based on the life and times of Mark Wahlberg, who is also an executive producer of the show, and from an interview I read with Wahlberg on the content of the show, he stated that all this stuff goes on in Hollywood, its classic. As I said before, if you're curious about the business, you'll get a kick out of this, its funny, its intelligent, and very engaging. 4 stars |
Envy
|
So far this millenium, Ben Stiller
has made enough appearances, starring roles and cameos both in front of and
behind the camera to put the most, ahem, hardened of porn stars to shame.
But with quantity comes loss of quality and this is a great example of that.
He's just the same character over and over again! This time around he's Tim
Dingman, a contentedly going nowhere mid-level boss at a factory of some
description. He likes routine, he likes going through the motions, he never
takes risks, and he definitely doesn't agree with his best friend's
seemingly dillusionary dreaming of one day making it rich. That is until
said friend, Nick Vanderpark, does just that, by making dog poo disappear.
But how is a moot point, Nick is, Tim isn't, enter the green eyed monster.
So much potential, so little to enjoy about the execution. Stiller has reprised his neurotic past characters from Meet The Parents/Fockers, Duplex, Along Came Polly and Something About Mary, and while true to that form, its just boring now. Bring back a Derek Zoolander or a White Goodman any day. Jack Black is enjoyable - in a non-Jack Black way - to watch and he gives Nick that true-friend essence we'd all love to be to our friends and have them be back. He's ok, yeah better than ok. Rachel Weisz's supportive-yet-disappointed wife to Tim is under utilised, and who knows why Christopher Walken's faux-phantom "J-Man" was even there. You'll get a few laughs out of it, and it was nice to have the toilet humour synonymous with a Stiller flick to be left out for a change. But still fails to entertain overall. 2 stars |
Exorcist: The Beginning
|
This is crap, I’m not sure what
any of it had to do with the original other than possession. The main
differences being that there were several people possessed in this one, it
happened in Africa (???) and…well I fell asleep so you’re probably better
off asking someone who actually watched the whole thing. Stace got through
it but I don’t think she was any more impressed.
1 star |
Feast Of Love
|
Set in the picturesque suburbs of
the Pacific Northwest (Oregon somewhere I think), Feast Of Love follows the
lives of several people all living in the same area, and how they change and
intersect over years. Definitely a chick-flick though an excellent-if-unknown ensemble and a few decent sex scenes stop this from its own mediocrity. Selma Blair gets a mention in the credits and a high billing yet is in the film for all of 10 minutes, ridiculous. Greg Kinnear is doing what he always has, Morgan's narrating, Radha looks magnificent...I dunno, I just can't find too much to separate this from the thousands of other chick flicks we get bombarded with every year. Still for all that complaining, and perhaps its unjustified, its still quite watchable and even finds itself tugging on the heart strings, I guess its not too bad. I think I'm just over the genre. 3 stars |
The Final Cut
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Yet another
brilliant-premise-shocking-execution flick that builds and builds and
builds, and instead of climaxing badly, this thing just stops! I kid you
not, I'd swear it is an unfinished movie!
Williams plays Alan Hakman, society's most respected Cutter. What is a cutter you ask? When children are born, the parents have the choice of placing an implant into their brain so that their entire life is recorded. The cutter is then handed the chip at death and his job is to splice together the life footage to be viewed by family and friends at the wake. Imagine it! So Alan finds clues to his past in one of his latest projects and goes against the Cutter's code to try and piece things together. But its not just Alan who is interested in his latest project and this is putting his life in danger. Awesome premise, I'd been looking forward to it for months after seeing a promo back in early '04. And did it live up to its potential? Well not really, and yet it did in some ways, I don't know, I was definitely disappointed. The most interesting topic to come out of it wasn't explored nearly well enough, and that was the community of people who had discovered they had an implant and wanted it gone by hook or by crook, and how they had been ostracized. Yeah it only briefly went there and that's just the beginning of where it could've gone. I mean why develop a whole new set of social rules, boundaries and morals and then not explore them. And then it just stops. There's this scene, and granted something happens that you don't really expect. And then credits. Shit, ripped off, persisted with it that long and it just dropped the ball, picked up its bike and rode home. Fuck heads! 2 and a half stars |
First Blood
|
Adrian! One of Stallone's few
forays into quality cinema. It was great to watch this again and it was more
to give Stace an idea of what movies were like growing up in the 80s, and
she enjoyed it so there you go. Doesn't hold a candle to the book which I'm
now dying to read again.
The continuity is a little jilted and to see it again you can really tell that they were overly keen to get into the action straight away. Of course the characters develop as the movie goes along, but seeing it now makes me feel like it was a second thought. And how great to relive one of the best moments in action movie history with John Rambo's breakdown towards the end. My hero! Its also interesting to see a couple of careers kick off here as well. Brian Dennehy starts his prick pigeon hole, and David Caruso as a policeman - doesn't look as though he regrets it yet. McGyver, eat my shorts! 3 and a half stars |
The Forgotten
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Telly is distraught having lost
her young son 14 months ago. Trouble is, her husband and therapist don’t
believe she ever had one. Has she lost it completely? A chance meeting with
Sam, an old friend of hers – who not only doesn’t believe her, he doesn’t
even remember her – brings back his estranged memories of a lost son. So are
they both going nuts? Tune in to find out.
This is totally intriguing from the get-go, albeit a little slow, and I can’t tell you anything more about it suffice it to say the plot twist isn’t what you’d expect. The cast probably didn’t need to do anything special here; it’s a blow-out of a story and stands on its own strongly enough to weather any cast. In saying that though, Julianne Moore does a great job, and you can’t go past Gary Sinise for quality. Interestingly, Anthony Edwards came out of retirement to do his cameo here. Sinister, bizarre, trippy, and hard to guess. Enjoy this. 3 and a half stars |
Formula 51
|
The L.A. and London underworlds
clash in this off-beat action/comedy/somethingerather flick about that one
final job. For super chemist (using his powers for evil, not good,
sic) McElroy (Jackson) its the ultimate score, one final drug deal to be out
of the business and living on easy street for life. For Emily Phillips
(Mortimer), this clears the slate and sets her free from her mob-life.
For DeSouza (Carlyle), well this gets him two tickets to Liverpool vs ManU
tomorrow afternoon. Mice and men and their plans and stuff. Jackson's surprisingly fresh after flopping out of SWAT and doing nothing in Kill Bill's 1 and 2, though the old rhetoric is ever present. He just seems to carry it around these days and directors must just go "Hey Sam, do your thing for a minute or so". It works ok here but he gets left behind a little with the old "norvern" attitude getting put into the mix. And therein lies a bit of a dichotomy, I mean you have the slow, deliberate delivery of Jackson being melded into the North of England's most notorious, and all done by a writer and director who have never done either on their own. Oh dear. It obviously doesn't work as well as I'd like, its like Jules versus Bebgy out there...ah enough, its good fun regardless. This is based around a drug that doesn't really exist, I mean if it did, none of us would have jobs from sleeping all day and being in love with the rest of the world by night, gazing on flying pigs wearing top hats...that said, you get an idea of the types of characters we're dealing with. McElroy seems a little homogenised (though handy with a golf club), but Phillips is oh-so-cool as the chick assassin and Rhys Ifans as Iki the you-name-it-he-can-get-it-for-you-for-a-price guy is over the top. At one stage he rips his clothes off to his underwear and you go "ah, I thought that looked familiar" LOL! The story rocks along with some pretty funky filming, okay-to-good dialogue and some totally raucous action sequences but is let down by badly executed sub-plots. A good example is when DeSouza is quite obviously a hard boy from Liverpool and our writer and director are trying to show us how good they can make him sound like he should've been in Lock, Stock...yeah nah, survey says <bip> <booooouuuuurrrrr>, but you did ok. Here's a collectable spoon. Not too bad, maybe wait for a 2-for-1 deal or something. 3 stars |
Framed
|
Nice surprise this one. The blurb
reads all very sinister and intense, but when the opening scene hits and
we're listening to those Caribbean tin drums and watching bikini clad women
strolling along the beach getting sun burnt, one is obliged to recheck ones
self.
Sam Neill plays Eddie Meyers, a key witness to one of the biggest bank fraud cases in history, has been MIA for some years after disappearing just before he was due to testify. He was one of the bad guys who turned state's. Mike Santini (Lowe) is NYPD, on vacation with his family when out of shear coincidence - while perving on chicks through binoculars - he spots Meyers on a luxury cruiser in the water and proceeds to track him down. After getting his man, the trial is once again renewed, but Meyers asks specifically for Santini for his interrogation and protection and attempts to make friends, but honest-cop-Santini isn't getting sucked into Meyers' play-nice attitude...or is he. We are immediately enamoured with our villain-cum-hero played brilliantly by Neill. Think Bond with more class, less respect for the law and more of a license to break it. If I were Santini, I'd be dropping around to the "wife's" house and saying yes to a few more diamonds, but that's where things get a little out of hand. Disturbingly trite are the movie-cop's wives who get worried, get lonely, or just get bored and end up with another man. Usually the husband's best friend of course. So no sooner do we find these things out, they've just about patched them up, but not before the husband has had an affair with someone else's wife and her female lover. Oh dear! All in all its a great little flick, and Neill's character will have you cracking your neck to embezzle some money from the mob and live it up on a luxury cruiser surrounded by beautiful people drinking champagne all day. Tops. 3 stars |
Gabriel
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Gabriel tells the mythical tale of
Arc Angels and The Fallen fighting for control of Purgatory, based on the
theological Catholic state-of-grace of the same name. When Gabriel is
sent to the city of Purgatory, the six previous Arc Angels have failed to
defeat the evil Fallen, either falling prey to their leader Sammael, or
having succumbed to the fear and sadness of the darkness. Can Gabriel
succeed where others have failed? This is and Aussie film, and I'm telling you this reluctantly because quite often its the case that being an Aussie sci-fi flick, people automatically write it off because Aussies don't have a good history with sci-fi. I know I do. Well bucks the trend, this is a fantastic production, apparently also done on a shoe-string budget which is all the more amazing. The accents, however, are a little hard to get into initially not being the traditional Aussie accents, running from almost-Australian to almost-American, yeah it gets odd at times. But once I got past those I actually found them quite natural and even complimented the movie's texture. The cast is completely unknown, to me at least, and that added to an already blank canvas of expectations, and I was really very nicely surprised. In fact minus the big names and the bottomless pit of money that created Constantine and Stigmata, this stacks up very well against them. Quality Australian output, give it a go. 3 and a half stars |
Garfield: The Movie
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A very poor movie that only
Garfield's attitude could save. Forget everything else, this is all about
the cat. There's side plots and occassional characters, but if you can
concentrate on the cat, the rest will just seem like elevator music. The movie takes place around the time Odie becomes part of the family. Garfield goes from self-imposed favourite to competing with newly adopted Odie, hijinks ensue. From the opening scene where a hungry Garfield can't wake up Jon by sitting on his chest, hence climbs the nearest book case and does a flying leap, I couldn't help but think they'd been studying Kaos. Kaos is Garfield, nay, Garfield is Kaos. The similarities throughout the movie are so striking it made the film really appeal. But when it comes to cat-isms, I'm sure all you cat owners have plenty of your own, so I'll put it down to being a proud papa. Major complaint - they animated Garfield, they didn't animate all the other talking animals and Odie. Why? Why make the distinction when there isn't any...between talking animals I mean. There's cats, rats, dogs, and they all talk and interact, yet they've only used CGI on Garfield. Bad move for mine, I was looking forward to all whacky characters, especially Odie, the number of times he's had his head jammed into a cookie jar and all the dog does is hop in its hind legs. Great. The human component is less than satisfying also. There's a love interest with a beautiful woman - who happens to be a vet - and a kidnapped pooch. Blech, was this stolen from Disney??? Anyone whose read the comic strip will agree that while a vet might pop in occassionally, Jon's got his hands full with the wreched feline, so a week-in-the-life would've been way more effective. We only get a glimpse of "Mondays", and even then its almost only the fact that he says it. Its very poor. The CGI is great though, pretty sure they couldn't have done a better job with Garfield. He's awesome to watch, and Bill Murray is inspired in being cast for the voice. But that's it I'm afraid. I'm glad I watched a borrowed rip of the French DVD release and didn't spend any cash... 2 stars |
Gettin' Square
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The Australian “gangster” films
are generally pretty good, and this isn’t an exception although it does
reinvent the wheel somewhat. Its all about Barry Wirth, he’s just gotten out
of the can after doing a stretch for armed robbery – cor listen to me, I
watch one flick involving a jail and its like I’m there, kind’ve like
rapping, really… Anyway so Barry’s back out on the condition that he takes
care of his younger brother Joey since their mother passed away. Joey’s
falling into the wrong company, Barry’s former dodgy boss Chicka Martin, and
some dodgy high up copper is harassing Barry into making the wrong move
sending him back behind bars. Meanwhile Darren Barrington, a long time money
laundering crook, who has been straight for a while now, has once again come
under scrutiny since his dodgy accountant was turned in by his scorned wife.
Darren’s legitimate restaurant business is not doing well either. So with
the help of Barry’s strung out junkie mate Johnny Spitieri, Barry ends up
working for Darren and setting his legitimate business in the right
direction, but there’s just too many dodgy people around for it all to not
go wrong.
Phew, that’s about as simple a blurb as I can get out, and yes, there’s loads of dodgy people therein. It starts out a bit slow and the characters hit us as unknowns, so it feels like we’re missing something. As the movie goes on of course, we get caught up really well, but I saw it as a little failure to have to jump straight into a scenario without knowing anyone. The cinematography is something to be seen though, there’s a beautiful shot at the beginning of the film where Barry is walking away from the jail after being released and you’ve got this wide shot of the harsh QLD outback below a brilliant blue sky and Barry walking across it. Yeah its nice, and the film is full of them. It’s a stark contrast to the gritty realism of some of the characters’ lives. Sam Worthington is outstanding as the brooding ex-con-cum-father-figure, you can feel him trying not to explode in the face of every adversity - and he sees plenty. I like Sam, I hope he sticks with it, he's the kind've Australian actor that heads Stateside for the action. David Wenham's junkie is great as well, though I'm not sure if you're supposed to laugh at some of his antics, its that its-funny-but-its-not stuff. Solid story once you're in the loop, good cast, not as good as The Hard Word or Dirty Deeds but its in that realm. 3 stars |
Godsend
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Wow this is great, this is one of
the best thrillers to come out since "Hand That Rocks The Cradle". Loads of
those "jump" moments, and aside from some flat acting and a few predictable
spots, this does the job just as well as HTRTC.
Paul and Jessie Duncan lose their 8-year-old son Adam in a freak traffic accident, the grief of the loss has more than overcome them. Dr Richard Wells however, offers them a chance to have their son back again, by way of cloning. And while they never really get used to Adam being back, it does make them happy. But circumstances change when Adam reaches the age at which he originally died, and he starts to change. Paul and Jessie get desperate to find answers before its too late... This is one of those movies that does two things really really well. First of all, the sound in this thing is amazing, this is how you should be using sound to create the general ambiance, as well as complimenting what is happening on the screen. Its exceptional to listen to and you get really absorbed as a result. The second thing this does well, and you don't see it often, is make the child character look really evil. I mean you get mischievous or bad children in movies, but they always lack an edge, because we as an audience can't be seeing an evil child. Children aren't evil after all are they...? Yeah the kid in this, whoa, if he doesn't make Omen's four through eight then you can cut me off at the knees and call me tripod! Only one other movie makes kids look this evil, and that's "The Good Son" with Macaulay Culkin, now that was an evil looking kid, but he pales our Cameron Bright. Remember The Butterfly Effect? Well he's the angry, ugly, evil 7 year old version of Tommy Miller, yup, this kids heading there already. The downfalls of this movie are far outweighed by what's good so I won't go on. But the plot does run thin and the acting at times is woeful. And while the end screams sequel, it also doesn't wrap up "Episode 1" very well either. Left me wanting a bit more than a bit, if you know what I mean. Also, De Niro's character while pivotal to the plot, starts to become quite inconsequential as the story moves on which I thought was a bad way to tell it, but hey, what would I know, I just watch the bloody things. Kinnear is outstanding though and well worth mentioning. See it with the lights down and the sound up 4 stars |
Gone Baby Gone
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Gone Baby Gone is an epic tale of
a missing child, and the path trodden by the people trying to find her.
Patrick Kenzie and Angie Gennaro, partners in both life and business, run a
detective agency specialising in finding missing persons. When little Amanda
McCready goes missing, and the police turn up no leads after the first
couple of days, distraught Aunt Bea McCready knocks on the PI's door
pleading for them to help. What follows is an intense, sinister and morally
testing tale of triumph and failure. What a great film, I've had it sitting on the player for a couple of weeks now but never got around to watching it. Put it on the other night finally and was blown away. Ben Affleck sitting behind the camera for the first time was always going to be interesting whether in a good or a bad way, and compared to his acting, man his directing is faultless. Maybe that's not saying much but trust me, this film looks the business. Affleck also co-wrote the screen play, based on the novel by Dennis "Mystic River" Lehane, so more brownie points there no question. Affleck is certainly in rare form here. In fact not since that Eastwood duo of Mystic River and Million Dollar Baby has a movie of this intensity come along, not for me anyway. The acting is top notch across the board, Casey Affleck is probably the standout though, he nails it. There is a moment fairly early on in the film where his character's boyish good looks and soft outward personality belies the strength within. At that point I found myself further drawn in to the movie, thinking the book had matched the cover. Not so, and so it goes for most of the movie, all is not what it seems. Great film, highly recommended for fans of Mystic River. I shouldn't make comparisons but there are points where it can't be helped. This one's going in the collection, but it does lose half a star for...well I can't really explain it or it might detract from your first-time take on the film. When you see it, let me know and I'll tell you the moment, you might even share it. 4 and a half stars |
The Grudge
|
The Japanese have a very unique
style of horror story to tell and The Grudge is no exception. A few of their
opuses are being let out onto unsuspecting audiences of late; The Ring and
its sequel are two of the successful ones, both remakes of Japanese
originals. This time around the Hollywoodisors have enlisted the direction
of Takashi Shimizu, director of the Japanese version Ju-On: The Grudge, just
to give it that extra authenticity, but for mine it should’ve been left
alone.
The Grudge takes the myth that if a soul dies in great anger or despair, it will haunt the place of its death for eternity, consuming all that it comes into contact with. So what hope did unsuspecting Karen Davis have? Not much. I found the movie ‘weird’. I understood what was going on in front of me but it still made no sense. I mean there is more than one soul to deal with; this isn’t made very clear from the start. But that goes some way to explaining how the movie plays out overall. Probably only for fans of the genre. 2 and a half stars |
Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban
|
I'm not a Potter fan by any
stretch. I've enjoyed the first two movies on their merits and was expecting
the third to be equally engrossing, but it isn't. Keep in mind that I'm
reviewing this from a movie perspective, not someone whose read the book.
Before I go on, its good to see their voices have finally broken :-) I didn't enjoy the movie. It has a very rushed feel to it, and the sets and environments have changed and for me have lost their grandure. Hogwarts appears to be a very different building from the outside. Things like the Weeping Willow thingy that destroyed whatshisname's car in the second flick, well that's nowhere near the building now, its down a hillside and over a bit. Similarly, Hagrid's granny flat is also down an exposed steep slope - I always got the feeling he was within the main building's grounds on the fringe of heavy forest. So for me I had no visual continuity. And the story, well I'm not the person to be asking specifics here, BUT, I have it on the best authority that they missed in inordinate amount of material that was covered in the book. No wonder I constantly felt like I was missing bits as the movie went, and they turned out to be crucial bits! When Stace started explaining some of them when I asked, the movie finally made sense. I believe that without reading the book, you'll be a bit lost in the movie, yet if you DO read the book, you'll be disappointed in the movie. There just isn't enough in the visuals to further the book's experience. 2 stars (I dare say Stace would be giving it less but you'll have to ask her) |
Haunted Mansion
|
Oh dear. I slept through most of
this, that should speak volumes in itself. Eddie's homogenised rhetoric,
despite its small stain, leaves an unholy odour. Skaifey managed to keep
with it to the end but her review wasn't nearly as favourable as this. 1 star |
Hidalgo
|
Hidalgo touches on the "true" story of Frank T
Hopkins, an endurance racer who competed in and won over 400 long distance
races, including a 3000 mile ride across the Arabian Desert back in 1890.
Hidalgo was the name of the Mustang stallion he rode. Its funny, before I rode a horse, I didn't really pay much attention to anything to do with these magnificent creatures. I would wince whenever steeple chase footage came on the news, but otherwise, they were simply another animal bigger than me, and therefore something to be shit scared of. Since riding a horse however, I have a new found respect that I believe we all should have. What an amazing animal, amazing companion, something we've taken for granted for years, centuries, since we started riding them really. And I'll bet it wasn't them that came up to us and said "hey dude, yeah wanna ride me around instead of walking everywhere, yeah I'll just carry you, put that uncomfortable shit in my mouth and lets go. I've told all my friends, so you can ride them as well." Suuuuuuuure. Human beings are so fucked! To further qualify that, we have to watch innocent American Indians fall foul of the American clean-and-sweep genocide a la 1800's. Go you human beings, American ones at that. Scared introverted little people, nothing's changed. Anyway, so back to the movie, ahem...1890 - Frank T Hopkins, part Sioux Indian, part dispatch rider, mostly a lush. He forgoes his post-war life in purgatory with the circus to take up the offer of riding a 3000 mile endurance race across the Arabian Desert. Unfortunately for Hidalgo, his horse, its a horse race not a human one. Though the story will try to tell you otherwise. I've said enough to give the impression that I didn't enjoy the film. In actual fact its one of the best adventure flicks I've seen but for a couple of stumbling blocks. The best bit about the film is the filming itself, wow, its a magnificent looking flick. Its a shame it came in under the radar with a straight-to-video release because this would've come off great on the big screen. Has that real 35mm deluxe feel about it, remember "The Lighthorsemen" back in '87? Beautiful film, horses too. The DVD has been enhanced with some THX thingy which I'm assuming makes things tops as well, thing is I was watching in the bedroom with my bomby old 51cm scat screen and it still looked sexy as! There's a couple of film comparisons that come to mind before I go further. One is the Indiana Jones and Mummy franchises; the other, unfortunately, is The Last Samurai: the beginning of it. Would you believe that? Seeing is believing folks. Get this, our hero is a civil war legend who is haunted by dreams of Native Americans being slaughtered. To escape this, he decides to tour with a circus that re-enacts Native American slaughters. He is also a raging alcoholic. He is then bullied into going overseas. Sounding familiar? Its like this carbon copy thing that I just can't get past and its a big negative against both films. I'm not sure whose to blame exactly but I'll find out one day. The other comparison is the Indiana Jones and Mummy franchises in terms of music, setting, the whole foreign land adventure thing, the desert (LOL), but they're all good comparisons and they've obviously borrowed here and there to enhance this. The plot goes along ok, though it stalls badly a couple of times and gets side-tracked away from the race (premise of the movie) for damsels in distress and villainous...err...villains. And through the whole thing I just couldn't help but feel sorry for poor Hidalgo - all the horses really. I was in tears at one point because all he wanted was some water after trekking Frank across some uninhabitable desert, but sure enough, no water, and sure enough, he just had to keep going. Poor thing. If I was Hidalgo I'd come back and stomp the shit out whoever decides to continue these endurance race bollocks, but Hidalgo's heart is too big and beautiful to be worrying about that. More than anything - including my anti-humanic sentiments...man I love making up words! - this film is designed and successfully achieves to celebrate the life of a great horse, whose loyalty, true guts and heart could never be equalled by any human being. Ever! 4 stars for the horse, minus a half for including humans, and another half for reminding us of America's genocidal history. |
Hide And Seek
|
If you can get yourself through the first 40 or
so minutes, you’ll love this. Where The Village builds up to being a big
pile of steaming shit, this one was headed that way but twisted nicely into
a positive direction as opposed to the afore mentioned.
Emily Callaway witnesses the suicide of her mother and internalises. Her psychologist father (De Niro) tries a move to the country to try and help his daughter’s situation. But things go from bad to worse when Emily’s new friend Charlie begins to taunt the family in the new house. But who is Charlie? Where did he come from? And how does he know so much? Keep watching! Finally a movie with some unexpected turns, I won’t go into it but yeah, great flick. Scary? No not really, though even Stace jumped at one point so it does have its moments for sure. Dakota Fanning makes this flick, even at eight years of age she is one of the most versatile, intelligent and believable actors going around. This would be one of her best, and one of her first with top billing, she’ll definitely go far. Everything else is fairly generic though never bad, a couple of nice cameos from Elizabeth Shue and Famke Janssen round out a very acceptable performance. Not bad on the big screen too if you can get to a cheap night before it finishes. 3 and a half stars |
Hitch
|
Yeah pretty boring actually. It had its amusing
moments but I certainly didn’t laugh. This falls squarely into the romantic
comedy genre following the tried and trusted formula of girl meets guy, girl
doesn’t rate guy but falls for his charms anyway. Guy doesn’t reveal
everything about himself necessarily and through complete coincidence, a
situation is completely misinterpreted sending budding relationship into
downward spiral.
Its so done before, doesn’t matter that Will Smith is now doing it either, though that’s what the movie marketed itself on. Will’s good, no doubt, but this kind’ve role isn’t a challenge for him. I like his intense side a lot more I have to say and we get glimpses here but not enough to win me over. Just a bit weak and formulaic for me. 3 stars |
Hostage
|
Yeah this wasn't bad I guess. If I were to be
really critical I'd pull out the shithouse rating because in the end it
really was that lazy an effort, but it has its moments. Bruce's plays Jeff
Talley, a police hostage negotiator. On one frantic day during a frantic
week, Jeff loses his third negotiation resulting in the loss of a family's
life. Fast forward a year and he's living in a small town in the California
country side eking out a mundane existence as town sheriff, that is until
three kids decide to take a family hostage in their own house, that just
happens to be its own fortress. As Talley's old colleagues from SWAT hit
town to take over, he relieves himself from the situation, only to be drawn
back in against his will as now his own family is in danger.
It does sound awfully convoluted doesn't it. The movie falls down in one main area, and that is we get no history, no build up, we're thrown in at the flash point wondering who the hell these people are and why they're doing what they're doing. Bruce's character is particularly inconsistent. Starting out in his negotiating role, he looks unconfident and completely brain fried, unable to help anyone much less do his job. After the assumed meltdown from losing the situation at the beginning we're introduced to, not the alcoholic, spiraling out of control lost cause, but a well rounded, comfortable and relaxed human being. Huh? Ok so once we've established that Bruce is ok, he is then confronted with this new hostage situation, he handles it with aplomb, hands control over to the authorities after starting a dialogue with the hostage takers and he's off home for muffins and coffee with the missus. In fact it takes a good long while before Bruce becomes un-ok in any situation. Now if we're going to break the stereotype of the hero confronted by his demons but triumphs in the end, they've gone the wrong way about it. We don't get to see why this person's demons aren't coming back, or why he hasn't got any. I mean if that’s the case, why lose it in the first place and run off to be a small town sheriff? Right? Maybe I'm looking too hard at this. Moving on to the crims and again, we don't really know why we're watching these teenagers drive around in a pickup making rude gestures at daddy's little girl, in fact we don’t even know they’re even criminals. It certainly didn’t help to have seen the nasty one in a movie just prior to Sabotage who loses his penis in a freak accident while pissing out the window. No, we just see kids wagging school and that’s it. And then all of a sudden they're breaking into a family's house, with guns, and assaulting them with intent to kill. Huh? Wayward kids don't make for credible hostage takers for mine, but that’s me. The movie is borrowing very heavily from previously better-done flicks and as such finds itself trying to outdo them. No one theme seems to stick. It starts out with hostages, then turns into a psychological thriller starring a Jason-for-the-new-millennium sicko; he of course has the skills and knowledge of a marine and is impervious to pain. And somewhere in there the negotiator role gets lost, then found, then lost again. Meanwhile outside, Bruce is making the inverted eyebrow worried face at everyone a la Die Hard. I struggled to get excited, Stacey and Brian on the other hand really enjoyed it, Brian so much so that he went and copied it for his collection. So what do I know? Well, if you're disagreeing with me then at least you took the time to read what I wrote ;-) 2 and a half stars |
Hotel Rwanda
|
A very powerful depiction of a modern day
African genocide that the western world sat back and watched with their
“hands tied”. It follows the true story of a hotel manager Paul Rusesabagina
who housed over a thousand Tutsis refugees during a time of upheaval from
rival Hutu tribe; Paul himself a Hutu. Not sure how many people were aware
of the tragedy that befell the nation during this period, but Bill Clinton
has been nothing but apologetic when he recalls the situation and the power
he could’ve mobilized to the area to help out if he just had’ve paid
attention in time.
I was speechless; Stace was in tears, very moving, incredibly sad. Here’s something I learned though, Rwanda was Belgium occupied up until a few years before this occurred, and the story goes that the Belgians granted the Hutus the power and jobs and money while they were there, but when they up and left, they granted the power to the Tutsis, hence the tribal conflict. Good old European dominance. Add to this the stellar cast led by the ever underrated Don Cheadle and you’re in for a ride. Outstanding human drama. 4 stars |
House Of Sand And Fog
|
One word folks: Tragedy. Cor, I couldn't
get one positive message out of this. It tells the story of Kathy who
is evicted from her home for an unpaid tax debt that wasn't even hers.
Behrani, an Iranian imigrant, buys the house from the council for a quarter
of its worth and renovates it for his family. Kathy is left with
nowhere to go and when her lawyer's attempts to regain the house fail,
Kathy's spiralling life collides with the new owners with tragic
consequences. Tragic. Tragic story, tragic characters, tragic lives. Its a fantastic tale, let it never be said otherwise, but be prepared to have your neighbours hide all sharp implements before this film ends, because chances are you'll go looking for them. Connelly thrives in this kind've role, the desperate, edgy, lonely and sad character is one she really gives life to. When she starts putting it on, not even the cavalry can save her. Kingsley is amazing, his unique genius is on display here, you'd think his character, Behrani, portrayed a life of his very own. Both outstanding and do the story justice. And then there's Lester, played by Ron Eldard, whose character is dreadful presence is just plain bad. Real bad, seismically bad! From the first time you meet the character you just want him to pull out his gun (he's a cop) and shoot himself. The inane decisions and immature responses and reactions really do pull away from the movie. I mean you're really sucked into this story, and then his character pops up and does something or says something (more like) and you just pull back and wonder was he the same in the book. I don't think Eldard is to blame, from what I can tell from the extras - granted its an exercise in self-hype - everyone thought he did a great job. Eldard would be best remembered as one of the four [grown up] kids from Sleepers. So yeah, I think its just a crap character, that's my take anyway. One other complaint I have about the movie - albeit small - is the cutaways, or what I like to call filler, that the director has used to segue between scenes. They are beautiful to the point of exquisite, but there are sooooo many of them. We get it, its foggy, lets move on. Its a thinker and its a feeler, so don't pop this one in looking for some light entertainment to bang out in front of you. Give this one the time it deserves, and try to ignore Lester if you can. 3 and a half stars |
The Human Stain
|
Kidman's third (of four) release this year, and
with absolutely no improvement on Cold Mountain and falling way short
of Dogville. I speak in terms of the movies here, her
performances in each are average at best. I've come to expect this
from Kidman so its all in a day's for me. Hopkins plays Coleman Silk, an aging professor who while being sued for a racial slander by two college students, meets and falls for a beautiful (apparently) and troubled stranger (Kidman). Blah blah blah, we turned if off about half way, ish, and never looked back. Boooooorinnnnng! Average performances, really bad, staggered, lifeless plot. And Kidman, who for me is not attractive at all, playing the love interest of Hopkins is stretching way further than the Connery/Zeta-Jones romance in Entrapment <shudder>, and that's saying something. Hopkins is ok, Sinise is all class as is Ed Harris but it doesn't pull the film out of its mediocrity. Its essential failure lies in the mood. There is none. You've got Kidman wailing about past relationships, Hopkins slipping off into some mysterious past that he may or may not be regretful of, and Harris playing the bellowing ex-con stalker. But there's no mood, no soul, nothing to build on. It just looks and feels like everyone is whinging. Anyway, the half of the film we saw is like that, maybe it ends better, I don't know and don't care. 1 and a half stars |
Human Traffic
Stars: A few Welsh maniacs Director: Justin Kerrigan Titbits: When Kerrigan wrote the screen play for the movie, he and his mates were flipping burgers and working in retail shops. The movie was just of his life. Lucky bastard! |
Human Traffic is getting on a little but is
without doubt as relevant now as when it was made. Some people
change...poor buggers. Are you into that kind've thing? Well
you'll have to see it to find out caus' I'm certainly not here to tell you
all about it.
Jip works in retail. Bummer. But its Friday and there isn't much that's going to stop him getting out there and blowing off some steam. His partners in crime feel exactly the same way. So lets go follow Jip on his weekend of debauchery. Its literally a weekend-in-the-life-of a group of friends who find total solace in their combined energy. And its all fuelled by...aaanyway so yeah its a great ride. See their inner thoughts, see their inner feelings, at the end of the day they're all saying what we say every other day. Except with a (mild) Welsh accent. At the time these guys were all no-names and still are. Danny Dyer (Moff) has had some moderate success with "High Heels and Low Lifes" and "Mean Machine" but yeah, this was something put together by mates, for mates, and it totally comes across that way. Nice one bruv! 4 stars |
