With This Policy, I Thee Wed . . .

Back in 1960 when my barber learned I was soon to be married, he told me how to avoid arguments.

He said, "You make all the big decisions and your wife makes the small ones, and you never step into each other's territory.

So she decides what you're going to eat, what sort of car you drive, where you live and how much you pay for your house.

You decide when the Americans drop their bomb."

Things are more democratic than that at our place and after forty-five years we're very happy. Unfortunately it's not like that for everybody and the divorce rate in Australia is now approaching fifty percent.

When you plight your troth these days you need to do it with your fingers crossed.

That's where Mamre Catering and Insurance Company comes in.

If you hire them to stage your wedding they offer a comprehensive range of longevity insurances.

For only twenty five percent on top of the catering cost (plus a small annual premium) they will insure the entire cost of your wedding in case of future estrangement.

And for another twenty five, they will cover the cost of the divorce!