Shorty

There is one group of people who have yet to find a voice before the Equal Opportunities Tribunal—short people.

They are the butt of cruel jokes and were even the subject of a song by the Drifters: They got little biddy legs and they stand so low, you gotta pick 'em up to say hello. We don't want no short people round here.

But discrimination against short people is not merely verbal abuse. Their daily lives are made difficult by lack of consideration.

Seats, for instance, are invariably too high. My own short person, Lynne, dreamed as a child on Sydney's trams of the day her feet would reach the floor. On a recent visit to Melbourne she discovered that she's still not tall enough—and she's not going to get any taller.

I can't even send her to a supermarket alone since she sprained her ankle. Too proud to ask for help she fell from a display rack while climbing to reach the top shelf.

At last something has been done about it.

Local inventor Herman Nutznboltz has patented an extendable arm that short people can use when they go shopping. It should make life a lot less dangerous for them.

Even so, I'm not sure if i want to be married to the sister of Edward Scissorhands.