Now Hear This!

Have you ever noticed that some people react more quickly than others to square dance calls? It doesn't matter in the long run, of course, since most of us have learned to adapt to the different pace of faster or slower dancers. The only time it really becomes a problem is when dancers are lost in thought and fail to react at all to the caller's voice.

It happened at our club last week when I called, "Sides promenade" and the number four couple, obviously murmuring sweet nothings to each other, forgot to move. They only just took off in time to avoid being trampled by the arriving twos.

When you consider that we have a limited number of beats for each figure it's a bit of a luxury to get six beats behind on any one movement. It stops the other dancers from completing the dance and is a major reason why so many callers grow old before their time.

But people don't like to be shouted at from the microphone so until the latest Hilton accessory arrived it was sometimes difficult to do anything about it.

Callers using Hilton equipment will now be able to buy, as an optional extra, a klaxon horn that blasts out through your speakers with all the enthusiasm of a semi-trailer overtaking on a blind curve. It only takes the touch of a button on your microphone lead.

It might rattle the windows and the furniture, and it might even shorten the life of your speakers, but it will also rattle your dancers' teeth. Hilton guarantee that after you've used it once or twice everybody will be so attentive that you will rarely need it again.

Of course, no solution is ever 100% perfect and there might still be the occasional blissful soul whose hearing-aid batteries have passed their use-by date. For them we recommend the Hilton cattle prod!